bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize