I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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