Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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