I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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