That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
