I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
