we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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