ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Randomize