Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
