still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
