You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
