Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize