Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize