he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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