Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
