Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
