Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
