Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just made out with a guy for $7.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
