I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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