Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I said "one day" and that day is not today
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
