dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
