Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
