I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
