And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
