i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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