i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Randomize
