This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
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