we're blogging at a bar
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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