I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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