I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
And my parents said I crawled through the house
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
