508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
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