And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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