God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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