I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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