you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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