those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
