he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize