I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
