Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
