ugly people sure do ruin things
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
