I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
