Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
wow bdsm is so cute
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