That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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