What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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