i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
