The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
