She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I want to fling myself into the sun
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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