I'm drive I can fine osifer
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize