He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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