he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
