were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
