I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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